Each day has the potential to be awesome. So does each dog. I have discovered, however, in my interactions with both dogs and days (including the dog days of summer) that they both have the potential to become infused with infectious enthusiasm--or just an infectious disease.
Such was today. I first
discovered World Rabies Day when a friend of a friend who had a dog
bite incident in Honduras—the friend of mine, not her friend who
wasn't in Honduras, mind you, and she didn't bite the dog first, it
was an old fashioned Western Saloon standoff—this is getting
confusing.
Scratch that. Take Two. A
dear friend of mine was bitten by a dog in Honduras last summer, and
she knew I had a thing for rabies, if not the actual virus (The jury
is still out on this one.) She told me of a wondrous day where all
things Rabies were celebrated. World Rabies Day...the words simply
slide off the teeth like infected saliva...If you're still reading, I
salute you. Your attention span suggests you don't have it, either.
WRD is actually an awareness holiday to let people know about the
importance of continuing to vaccinate animals worldwide, as 55,000
fatalities occur every year because of rabies.

Last year on September
28, I celebrated WRD at BYU in grand fashion, strapping a coonskin
cap to my head and taping a sign to my chest that stated “ 'Tis
World Rabies Day!” I then proceeded to run around campus all day
with the goal to share the joy, sharing actual statistics with people
who took me seriously and advising all others to “catch the spirit
of the season, not the disease.” Hundreds were educated that day,
and I like to think that someone eyed the bushes in their front yard
suspiciously that night, convinced a rabid foe lay hungrily wait.
I thought not any Rabies
Day could top that first momentous celebration of life and the
prevention of its loss by infected furry friends. I thought wrong.
5:30 AM I awoke as
happy as most people are on Christmas, or as happy as Scrooge is on
December 26th. I stepped outside to exclaim with joy as I
saw the Great Rabid Bat in the Sky (brings rabies-themed gifts to all
the uninfected good girls and boys, but it's got a low budget and
can't usually bring more than dead bugs to people, so next time you find a dead dragonfly on the porch, feel honored) had deigned to
visit my doorstep. It was adorned with crepe paper, snarling mammals
and a sign that said “Happy World Rabies Day!” I knew it was to
be a truly awesome day. A similar sign had been taped up to the
banister in the main stairway to share the message with all.
Breakfast was good. I was just exclaiming my joy on this lovely
holiday to some people at my table when they casually mentioned that
maybe Lizzie of our group was rabid, too. I laughed at this seemingly
irrelevant comment when suddenly I felt a sharp pressure on my right
shoulder and turned to find Lizzie's teeth in retreat from my freshly wounded arm.

“Bah!” I exclaimed. I
then teared up. What a beautiful holiday greeting! I thanked her and
Lizzie smiled back. She has beautiful teeth and a great smile. More
so when they aren't sunken into my deltoid. I
reached out to give her a hug. As she came in, her shoulder came
within easy reach of my canines. I instantly seized my chance and bit the unsuspecting Lizzie in one fluid motion. Rabies had struck again.
 |
| I set this as the background on the Center computers as a friendly reminder. |
The day continued in
glory. Trying to share the love, I changed the background of each of
the computers in the lab with the attached picture, once again
advising them to “catch the spirit of the season, not the disease.”
Shawn took this sublime message to heart and mouth. A shocked gasp
and then laughter met Shawn as he walked into Old Testament, jowls
covered in rabid foam—er, shaving cream. During the class, our
teacher would take a comment or question from Shawn and momentarily
lose concentration before returning to the subject at hand.
When it came time for
our next class, Studies of the Ancient Near East, I felt inspired.
Shawn, Nicole Hawkes, and I all smeared our jaws with shaving cream
to get in the festive mood. When our professor saw we were already
entering the advanced stages of the disease, he could only shake his
head in disbelief and tell us of the cause of the Egyptian New
Kingdom's fall. No, it wasn't rabies.
In the evening, we had
dinner. I watched people flagrantly defy the spirit of the day by
feeding stray cats, but my rage was placated by the awesome fried
bananas at the salad bar. Later on, we had a “Pin the Eye on the
'Coon” contest (I had an Evil Eye magnet from Turkey) and a
tropical fruit party. This, because if I knew I had rabies and only
had a little while to eat and live, I'd be eating tropical fruit. We chose persimmons and passionfruit.
Yet the best part was
still to come. Through the wonderful mechanism of social action known
as Peer Pressure, four rabid fans of the Day-- Mackenzie, Nicole,
Shawn, and I slathered some shaving cream 'round the jaws and set off
to visit Lizzie again. We found her cuddling and watching a movie in
the theater-like forum, but even PDA couldn't save her now. I set the
bite to the arm, and for a moment the day's festivities seemed
to be over. BUT THEN--

Andrew, who is
charismatic, hilarious, and tall, sees the deed take place. Without
hesitation, he leaps to his feet and sprinted out of the room. At
that moment, our predator instincts kick in as our eyes hungrily
follow our departing prey. We give chase, howling and snarling as
we rushed through the narrow halls leading out of the forum. We were
fast, but Andrew was faster. He ran so fast that the girl sitting on
the couch outside conveniently “couldn't remember” which way he
went. There was no sign of him. How could this happen? Howling with
mock rage, we sought him out across the different levels and hiding
places of the center, seeking our prey. During the chase, we took a
consolation prize—virtually every human being in the center that
unluckily stumbled across our path. Surprised and disbelieving, few
withstood our pack of frothy jaws for long. It was lucky so many
people were in their rooms by this point (Annie included) for we
showed little mercy. The entire laundry room fell, as did the
stairwells. Nicole and Shawn went for my roommate Jacob, who was
having his hair cut at the time. Bad idea—the man's arms were
covered with loose hair which went straight into their mouths. Few
joined us after they'd been bit. I figured as much, the infection
usually took about 9 days to set in.
We kept searching, but
we never did find Andrew. All this time, he had hidden in a room we'd
simply overlooked in our frenzy. He had recruited people loyal his
cause to hide him. They never did tell us his location, and he was
saved from certain infection. Over fifteen minutes he waited in the
dark for the chance to escape to his room, which finally presented
itself when we overran the laundry room.
By the time our biting
rampage was over, maybe more than fifteen people had “perished,”
and we considered that the Ghosts of Rabies Past, Present and Future
had been appeased, if such things existed. And so we called it a
night, and anxiously began anew the countdown to the next World
Rabies Day, just a mere 364 days away.